Valentine's meme- Nearly 8 Years

The latest meme on Facebook, which is sure to hit full stride this weekend, is for people to put as their "status" how long they've been together. This of course elicits a series, of gushy comments from all your girl friends (haven't seen a lot of guys participating in this one). I won't indulge in this one- I don't like broadcasting that info in that format, and when I tallied up the numbers, I noticed Matt and I have been together a really long time- for people our age. The people we were when we first met seem so different from who we are now, it's embarrassing to think we were ever so sophomoric, or that being that young was so long ago. And it seems unfair to take all that and make it one little number.

Nearly 8 years ago, when Matt and I starting seeing each other, I was 18 years old, I thought I might never graduate high school (in a melodramatic teen kind of way), I got my first job, and was trying to learn how to be independent while I waited to head out to college. And Matt was this sweet guy who had funny stories, a quiet but joyful sense of humor and was really into crazy adventures. Well, they seemed crazy to the 18 yr old me. I felt really lucky to get to hang out with a guy like that, for just a little while. See, I didn't want to get to invested in the whole thing, because I knew I was going to WWU in the fall. And Matt was going to be transferring away from UAS then too. It was early in that first summer when we realized we would both be at Western.

When we moved to Bellingham, I was an energetic but clueless freshman, and Matt was happy to be my knowledgeable and experienced counterpart- he never got lost on campus, he knew about all these cool hang outs on and off campus and he wanted to share all this fun with me. Could a girl get so lucky? He had a house, with a proper kitchen where I could go and cook, or just not be around 20 girls. I like to think he benefited form having me around too- I dragged him through Calc 2, we would go on suburban adventures together and a loner like him really likes to attention.

We've actually been married for 3 and a half years- which also seems like I long time. I thought by now I'd be really good at it. Matt told someone over the phone yesterday that "my wife says the streets in Oakland are still bad." And I was a little surprised to find he was talking about me! Being married in grad school is hard- there are such demands on my time, I don't get to commit as much time as I would like to it. Matt is sleeping off a cold this morning, and I am about to head in to work for the afternoon, which breaks my heart a bit. But it is clear that being married is WAY better then being single, and that we can still find ways to be important for each other in our new life together.

Yesterday morning I got an email from Matt at work that he had stopped out in the suburbs, and bought a new set of winter wheels. He threw down towels over the slush to change out the tires , and carefully covered the back seat in an old sheet before piling in the old tires and heading off to work. So yes, he still has funny stories and crazy adventures, and I still feel really lucky to get to hang out with him. I still wonder about what kind of job I'll ever get, although now I am more confident that I won't end up somewhere I can't be happy.

We don't have plans to celebrate this weekend, but will probably do something fun together this week (my vote is for Ethiopian food), to celebrate Valentine's Day. For all the rest of you- Happy Valentine's Day!