I apologize for being a bit negligent of the blog of late- I think by next week I will be resigned to my fate, but for now it still seems like I can vastly improve (change?) my dissertation, and I am compelled to do so. This means the few things I've been doing that weren't writing have slipped by the way side, as has my regular sleep schedule alongside the balanced part of my diet. Good thing you can't OD on yogurt! I promise- for the sake of the blog- to do lots of fun, blog-worthy things over the summer to make up for the boring-ness of the springs blog posts. Y'know, for the blog.
But I am here today, because I need your help. I have been in a kind of "don't jinx it" denial about getting a Ph.D. for a long time. Yesterday, the announcement of my seminar was sent around my department and to other departments on campus, and something about seeing my name on the formal announcement made it seem real. Really, stomach clenching, blood freezing real. And Shaoshu reminded me of one of the many aspects that I am totally unprepared for- How am I going to use the title?
I know some people who feel they worked hard to earn that title and are gonna use it- dang it!, but I think I am little embarrassed about it. Maybe because I have spend the last several weeks working on revisions, this process hasn't left me feeling profoundly smart. My plan is to get through the remainder of my adult life without people knowing immediately that I have a Ph.D. I mean, I don't want to be the Central Casting type for the next episode of Big Bang Theory. And I REALLY don't want people turning to me in case of a medical emergency; "I thought you were a Doctor!?" I am hoping to get to use it in other less important places- signing petitions or writing checks or getting a home loan. Maybe I'll finally get my married name on all my magazines and catalogues with the upgrade. Any thoughts on where and when a person should use the title ? (which you'll notice, I couldn't bring myself to append to my own name in a blog post. It's gonna take some getting used to.)
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At times I remember being very self-concious about being "Dr. Preecs", especially when I knew I was a callow intern/generalist who anticipated being put on the spot for every mystery ailment discussion known to man. I've come to accept it as part of what identifies me to my patients and validates their trust and expectations. You will have to take a deep breath and learn to use the honorific consistantly as a professional. Your collegues will need to recognize that you've done the drill. Its quite possible you can be so modest that your contemporaries won't realize you've got the credentials and arn't just another pretty face. It's really just a matter of answering the phone as "Dr. Seguin", making a point of addressing and acknowledgeing your PhD pals as Dr. X when you introduce them to someone new so that they return the favor. You don't have to correct people unless you really want to or have to in some delicate situation. Professionally, you don't want to be Sandlin from Alaska, you want to be Dr. Seguin from Pitt. Just use it, you don't have to confront sales people about it, you just need to get it into peoples head that you've passed the "test". You're not a tech or a student anymore. You're come of age as a scientist and a scholar. Its nothing to be embarrassed about. We can't be the only people in the family who are proud, you've got to bear some of it, too.
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